In yoga class, I teach that your body goes where your eyes focus, so always look where you want your pose to go. In life, it’s the same.
People often feel great anxiety as they say, “I’ve wanted this for as long as I can remember…why hasn’t it happened yet? Hey, Universe…where’s my stuff?”
In my favorite, So-Simple-But-Still-I Have-To-ReRead-It-Everyday inspirational book, Ask and It Is Given, Abraham-Hicks says the ONLY reason you don’t have exactly what you want is because you don’t know that every subject is really TWO subjects: what you want, and the lack of it. The side you’re focused upon is what you get. So – where’s your focus? Relief, and anxiety. Hint: Look at your life - it’s a perfect reflection of what you’ve been focusing on. No exceptions.
Now – what are you going to do about it?
How often do you hear people say they want to be healthy, as they’re complaining about their irritable bowel syndrome (in way too much detail…)? Relief, or anxiety?
Students come to my hot yoga studio and, after laying their mats perfectly in the warm, relaxing hot yoga room and fluffing white towels over their mats like soft beds, they come out into the cold reception room and complain about their ailments. Focus: anxiety.
All the while, there’s this warm, cushy spot, right behind the door, to lie down, surrender and melt into bliss…relief is waiting and you’re missing it!
At best, they’re venting before they willingly deposit their aches and pains outside the hot yoga room.
I am eternally hopeful.
At worst, they’re reinforcing their beliefs in their illnesses and emphasizing the anxiety that probably created the illness in the first place.
After 90 minutes of hot yoga, one of two things happens: if you follow the highly detailed hot yoga class instructions, designed to fully occupy your mind with Warrior-type YES I CAN DO THIS! thoughts, your old limiting beliefs go up in smoke (and sweat), and hot yoga becomes your magic place of healing and balance.
Or…
You come out of class feeling your pain even more. (“See, I told you I was too ill /old/overweight/inflexible for this hot yoga thing!”)
There is Option 3: you feel GREAT relief after class…but soon enough your old anxiety reappears and alongside it, the old ailment. Maybe it pops up on the ride home from hot yoga. Maybe it’s right there with you in the hot yoga reception room. And so you blame hot yoga for tricking you into thinking you were all better.
It’s all you. Always has been.
Maybe it’s not so easy to choose relief when anxiety is every present; but I think it’s just that you didn’t know you had a choice. You can CHOOSE to feel just a little bit better than the anxiety and lift your focus upward one tiny bit – and before you know it, your whole self comes along for the lift.
You say you want more money in your life. But instead, you talk about how little money you have. The unpaid bills. The Choos you want but can’t afford. You’re focused on the opposite of what you say you want…and then, you get what you’re focused on.
How can you choose relief when you’re in the midst of anxiety? When you become sensitive to the way you feel, you can shift your focus to what is wanted. You can become an expert at knowing where you are focused by practicing the art of What Feels Better (stay tuned for my next blog post).
And a little hot yoga wouldn’t hurt either.
If you are in good posture, meaning your hips, intervertebral disks, and knees are properly aligned, your body can withstand tension and stress. Your lungs, nerves, digestive tract, and glands perform better, which are included in the overall health benefits of hot yoga.
Wow…great examples of how the law of attraction works. I have seen it work so many times both positive and negative!
Thanks for offering your services….I just might take you up on them…..
Hi Solvita – I love Abraham Hicks because they make mastering yourself easier, with a variety of how-to processes designed to raise me a half-step up from muddy places in my life, my day, my thoughts. Almost instantly, after doing an Abraham-Hicks process, I FEEL better… and then EVERYTHING looks better…and then, it IS better. And I know I am in charge of it all. So simple.
Thanks Rhonda, I love all the books by Abraham-Hicks! It is very true about focusing your mind, the hardest work is to master ourselves, however the best rewards and receiving at the end
Have a great day!
Hi Norma – So true! The negative does serve a purpose: to clarify and specify even more what you DO want, but contrasting what you DON”T want! Just clarify and move on without lingering in the negative (which leads to whining, complaining and a downward spiral to nowhere) and you’re always on your way to a joyful life.
Hi Sibyl, I know what you mean. I have a simple technique for choosing wisely and without anxiety. Let’s say you’re on the fence, deciding whether to marry someone who has asked you (this actually happened to a friend of mine). Close your eyes and imagine yourself saying, “Yes, I will marry you.” Do you feel a sense of relief…or an involuntary cringe? Instantly – no thinking – what feeling comes up? It may be hard to pinpoint the name for the feeling, but you know if you feel a tightness in your gut, or a relaxed feeling. Then do the opposite: eyes closed, first feeling you get when you say, “No, I am not going to marry you.” The instant feeling of relief or clench is your clear signal, your guidance. Now, once your feelings signal you, immediately your thoughts kick in to cloud the issue; “But he’s a good person, a good provider and what if I never find anyone better?” Those thoughts feel terrible. This is the point where many people begin to second guess their initial “gut” reaction…and after all, we’ve been told to “think things through,” “look before you leap,” “weigh both sides…” all bad advice! Your gut is your guidance and ALWAYS points in you the direction that is best for you. Try this little technique – I call it Relief of Recoil? – next time you’re “unclear” and let me know how it goes.
Loving this article, Rhonda – your passion, your purpose. Stay away from the negative. They key to living a life filled with joy…
Norma Doiron @The LEARNED Preneur ╰☆╮
I love this article, Rhonda! I love your passion and purpose. It’s so true, what we Focus on is what we get. The great thing is that we can change our reality quickly with a positive thought on what we are Focusing on. Thanks, you are such an inspiration to so many
Rhonda, this is a great post. There are a lot of benefits to yoga and who wouldn’t want relief over anxiety? And who wouldn’t want that in their life choices, but I have to admit, sometimes the line seems blurred, but maybe that just means I’m not as clear on some things as I think I am.
This is a good reminder for someone like me who has to practice not focusing on the negative. Just catching up from blog luv Wednesday. I posted mine early in the day and didn’t get to come back and finish up until today.
Hi Ingrid…yes, you’d think so, as that would make sens; if you want the perfect mate, it would make sense to think about the details of that perfect mate. Most often what happens though is that people tend to wallow in the lack of having the perfect mate in their lives…how bad that feels, how lonely, sad, etc – and that brings them more of THAT – loneliness, sadness, etc. The trick is to catch yourself and shift your focus. Not only do you help your desires to manifest, but you feel better RIGHT NOW – and right now is where you live.
I think a person’s focus will go automatically to what they want to change.
Great comment, Steve. Kudos to you and keep going – you’re headed in the right direction: YOUR direction!
It’s funny…I used to think this philosophy was new age mumbo jumbo, however, when I look back on my life, the things I really, REALLY, wanted, I was able to achieve. But I just ascribed the fulfillment of those goals to luck. I was an actor after college, and I wanted to be in a broadway show buy the time I was 25. Well…I opened in a Broadway show six months before turning 26! Now, unfortunately the show closed in 3 days… so perhaps I should have wished for being in a long running broadway show by 25! But while I accomplished the goal, I just thought I was lucky.
So when I got what I yearned for…it was luck. When I didn’t get what I wanted, it was my fault. Hmmm…what’s wrong with that picture? Today I have no problem knowing what I want, visualizing it, and believing it will happen. Knowing it will happen.